August 11, 2020•272 words
Quite. I also make jam, which I sell to people in unsealed jars. I mean, it's sterile when it leaves me: I can certify this: my jam-making systems are most secure. And the whole installing-a-lid thing is really a pain to do and takes fractions of a second per jar. After all, it's really not my problem if opportunistic nasties sneak in and breed in it in transit so that what reaches people is not jam but some horrid bacterial stew. Anyone who consumes my jam can always run a battery of very careful tests over it to make sure it is still jam and not jam with added bacteria. These tests are easy to do: I'm sure everyone does them.
And those lids that tell you if something has got in to the jam by letting you check the vacuum? Yeah those ones: they don't always work you know, and anything that is not infallible is useless, as all true believers understand. There is, after all, only true and false: I reject the notion of fractions, let alone the heresy of real numbers.
And some of the people who go on and on about jam transit safety, they don't even lock the doors of their jam-making facilities properly! I mean, would you believe it? Anyone could walk in off the street and add anything they want to the jam at source. That completely invalidates anything they say. Of course, if they did lock their doors then what they say would immediately become true: that's how logic works you see. I am very clever.
Mostly, my customers don't die. Mostly.