[8:48pm] [4/8/19]

April 9, 2019

today was...
not good.

i only saw stella for like 2 minutes total today
and in that 2 minutes, the only words said between us were
"hello"
"hey"

i want to fucking die

i know that all that stuff with the hug was just pure coincidence and that i shouldn't think too much about it but like i just want to be around her literally all the time and i can't do that and it s U C K S

[5:32pm] [4/7/19]

April 8, 2019

so last night was closing night for the musical and at the cast party i sat next to stella and we talked a little about the show, since neither of us had actually seen the show we'd spent months working on she had to left at 12:50am, and when she left, i got up and gave her a hug and she was squeezing really tight and i just meLTED because she doesn't normally do that with hugs and aAAAAaAAAaaAAAAAaaaAaaAA idk anymore i just want to be with her all the time and i know i can't do that because ...

[9:10pm] [4/17/19]

April 18, 2019

on monday, i was walking around, talking to some people during seminar, and then i saw stella buying some stuff in the cafeteria so i walked over and then we walked around for a little bit together after we walked around for a bit, we went to mr. bernhart's desk there were quite a few people over there, but that's beside the point. someone gave stella some spicy cheetos and they were way hotter than she was expecting. she kept eating them, and her cheeks got a little pink andAAaaAAAaAa she's s...