A cat is a nice way to ensure that you are never the most important thing going on. Kids do this too, but not as well as cats.
Cats should come with houses. Cats don't care about the people in the houses, they care about houses. They are the realtors of the pet world.
It is said coffee is socially acceptable crack, but when did crack stop being socially acceptable?
You live longer with coffee because without coffee at a certain point you would just fall asleep and never wake up.
We should be more scared of Bluetooth.
Acorn squash do not look like acorns.
After a while, you just have to go to bed.