may 24 2019

so one month from my birthday which is nice

also idea for watching youtube comfortably... virtual reality!!! :D

father got here and made me mad
abby got here and made me weary and gave me a headache

i hate my family. i hate the fact she married someone who's 90% surely abusing her. i hate the fact he is a homophobe terf conservative. my mom is the only good one.

i went downstairs for some fucking food and i came up with "dinner'll be in 2 hours", my eyes tired as fuck, a headache from that goddamn dog, guilt-tripping from my father, and a general hatred for everything. i'm so fucking pissed and i've got no one to talk to. louie is busy and hasnt been talking. i feel weird talking to jarrek all of the sudden. i can't even rp until dinner's ready because niilo is taking his sweet goddamn time to respond as always. i want to cry into my pillow. i just really fucking want some good food. not steak. not all of this bullshit. i could make something except that i cant make good chicken here and idk what fries we have and even then i'm still downstairs and everyone's here and aggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

on top of ALL of that, i'm thirsty as hell right now. i can't even force myself to smile i'm so annoyed and anxious and sad and mad

i finally made some food (its 5:00, dinner's in 30 mins anyway) and i may have even more soon if i can handle it. ate an entire package of kroger-branded steak fries with cajun spice so my stomach is full and my stomach acids are mad at me heh


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