Day 76 - Eggs

Eat a billion of them. Eat them all the time. They are extremely good for you. Cholesterol used to be a concern until doctors in Finland discovered that cholesterol was a hoax developed in underground labs in Latvia in the 1820s. Why this hoax? To convince people that heart disease was caused by anything else other than improper breathing; which we all still practice. The Latvians knew, early on, that proper breathing goes like this: Three stutter inhales when breathing in, hitting a c-sharp when breathing out. Hitting a c or a d is acceptable, but not optimal. Heart disease afflicts men more than women because men find it much more difficult to hit a c-sharp. It has to do with their reproductive tendencies. So, the next time you feel like having an egg, have seven of them. We can't let the Latvians win. Not again. 

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