Day 80 - Conference calls

Everyone who isn’t talking is texting. People have tape over their webcams in case the “turn camera off” isn’t working. Half of the people have done their hair and put on a nice shirt to feel like go-getters, but their resolve is waning. They’re starting with their pants. Once they stop putting on makeup, the descent into madness begins. A lot of people are also texting about how bored they are about the meeting. But some people are going to slip. They’re going to get caught being a slob or swearing or using their phones. A few singers will accidentally share their new talents. When everyone has to face each other again, fresh new horrors will emerge. Some people will have gained immense weight. Some people’s eyes will have darkened after the strain of isolation has flattened their souls. Those people have forgotten the gods of entertainment and their suffering is deserved. Praise.

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