I knew our paths would cross. I had a couple of stories to share to be able to engage with you lightheartedly but when our paths crossed I was not able to work either one of them into a conversation. I am frustrated about that.
In the past you had mentioned that it seems like I run away from you and don't want to be on your team. I think that is partially true. I hate standing around wondering who should go where and to what team so I will be the first to volunteer to step out. I also get bothered when good players refuse to mix it up. The other half of it is, there are others that love you on their team. I am not going to compete with them.
Maybe that is part of my problem in life. I won't compete for the things I want. I won't stand in line at Costco for a free sample because I am not going to follow the crowds.
The other part of the problem is that I don't know what I want in life. I think I am ruled by FOMO. That reminds me of the Adam Grant podcast where he suggests that we need to re-frame FOMO to being grateful for missing out. Easier said than done.
It is funny how I get to this point and feel like I have said something worth saying and then when I reread what I wrote it does not get anywhere near describing the emotions I am really feeling. I almost feel like I have Locked-in syndrome.