Descriptive Writing: Practice

The old, rusty carousel just stood there. It stood amidst the rumbling sounds of the Roller-coaster that spiralled into ginormous loops, the sweet, sticky smell of candy floss being sold just in front of the carousel to witness how the sight alone attracted children towards it. The faded shades of yellow was nothing compared to the bright lights on display boards outside every ride. The intricate designs on the vintage carousel fell apart like sand, and the carousel stood there to experience it all.

No one went close to the carousel. It was magnificent yet haunting. The metallic horses and colourful carriages were no longer attached to the carousel. Instead, they laid there on the the dull ground, lifeless. A blanket of darkness loomed over the carousel in the form of grey clouds, entrapping it. The creaks of the crumbling carousel sounded like shrieks in agony. Yet, no one noticed. No one cared. They were having too much fun to notice the ruin that the carousel was.

• I used a decent range of vocabulary
• I talk about the details from the image provided
• The writing doesn't have much of a flow
• The atmosphere being set is pretty inconsistent and not clear.
• I used punctuation and grammar