Fishing for answers

Two years ago we were rehabbing our first house – a crappy duplex in Chicago. Imagining I was a lot handier than I actually was, I decided I wanted to take on some of the smaller projects myself: light fixtures, window treatments, painting, landscaping, that kind of stuff. I made a lot bad decisions in these projects that led to me getting stuck. In fact, almost everything I touched I fucked up and had to call a pro to come fix. For a few weeks we had half-working light fixtures, missing blind...

Aviva and I live in the crappiest, smallest house of anyone we know, and we absolutely love it. The bedrooms are small, there’s almost no closet space (Aviva’s closet is in the basement), there’s no garage, hardly a yard, a tiny kitchen, dated bathrooms, nasty carpet – and we both work from home. On the flip side, the house is well-insulated, has a ton of natural light, amazing water pressure, and its really all we need. Our goal is to stay put in this house for 5-8 years, ideally with a c...

It’s the last week of elementary school. You’re slurping down a Fla-Vor-Ice and basking in the your team’s tug-of-war victory. That’s right, it’s Field Day. Mitch and I were early to the suburbs, and despite occasional dinner plans, we were sorely lacking community in the burbs. It’s no mystery that the suburbs are boring, so we decided to spice it up with some childhood nostalgia. We bought supplies, created a rule book, and invited everyone we knew to the first annual Adult Field Day. We...

Do you complain about things often? Really think about it. Is that too often? Or maybe about right? Things may not be perfect (or actively bad) but I think complaining can often make them worse. I think this comes from the idea that complaining is generally unhelpful and doesn’t really make anything better, although I guess it can make you feel better temporarily. If you’re going to complain about something, what about turning it around? Maybe this is another platitude, but I kind of like ...

Greetings – I'm Aviva, said wife and life-contemplation partner. Your uncle would call me "woo-woo," I did just have a chakra alignment last week. I spend a lot of time thinking about the intangibles. My favorite conversations are the ones that speculate on the absurd facets of being human and the meaning of it all (or lack thereof). Luckily, Mitch enjoys this too. If you've stumbled across this blog, we hope you find a relatable nugget or a new perspective to consider. Tootles, Aviva ...

I often put things off until later. Some indiscriminate duration when I'll have more freedom, money, space. Maybe it's travel or woodworking or house projects or a date with Aviva or a call to a friend – it feels very easy to put it off. Is this bad? What if it doesn't feel right to do it now? Or maybe you're just being lazy? There's a quote about this that I love: The trouble is, you think you have time. – Jack Kornfield It could be a small thing or maybe a life-long dream but wouldn't i...

I don't like say "happy birthday" because I think it's kinda boring. I guess there's nothing really wrong with it, but don't you think it's a bit overused? Like played out? Like it's just something you say but don't really mean? Something you might leave in a message to your great aunt because you can't think of anything else to say? Happy happy birthday Aunt Mary, hope you have a great day! Like, come on, where's the fun, spirit, cynicism in that? As I've gotten older, I kind of understand ...

I think a lot about the people I love dying – especially my grandparents – as that is likely closer than my other relatives. Luckily, they're still in great shape, active, and I see them often. This is truly a privilege I wish everyone could have. Thinking about their deaths is exceptionally painful – it's heartbreaking and lonely. I've gone to therapy and read a lot about grief and mourning as a way to maybe anticipate or mentally prepare myself for the future. I don't think it will work. The...

How certain are you about your understanding of the world? I was extremely confident in my world-view, but now I'm not. It was an easy way to live being able to say something is a certain way. Why was I so certain? In the past 4-ish years, I've been coming around to this realization that I don't know sht about fck. I've been alive for 30 years and sometimes I'll purport to know something about how life was in the early 1900's because I learned it in history class? That seems super weird. How ...

Aviva and I love to dance. She grew up a competitive dancer and loved ballet. I grew up an awful dancer and kind of picked it up through college. When planning our June 2023 wedding, there wasn't a whole lot we cared about except having a fun band and a hopping dance floor. We thought it would be especially fun to kick off the night with a well-choreographed first dance. About 9 months before the wedding we decided to start taking dance lessons at a professional studio and we got pretty into ...

A couple weeks ago we went out with 3 other couples to a really nice sushi place. We had a great time and had delicious food. After the meal, you could kind of tell that everyone was still kinda hungry. Of course, we live in polite society and just paid for an expensive dinner, so nobody said anything. We all then decided to go back to one couples' house, and on the way Aviva and I decided we would stop and get a bunch of McDonald's nuggets to surprise everyone. When we got to the house, ever...

Over the past few weeks Aviva and I have been talking about home school, suburban life, AI, and homeownership. For context: we do not have any kids we own a small house in the suburbs of Chicago we invest in real estate in Wisconsin a couple people we really admire recently decided to home school their kids we are both in tech and are heavy users of AI it writes a ton of the code for my job it helps me analyze rental properties it helps Aviva put together presentations Aviva uses it as an...

Hi 👋 I'm Mitch, a 30 year old guy from the northern suburbs of Chicago. I used to be a lot more certain in my understanding of the world than I am now. My wonderful wife Aviva and I talk a lot about what we want out of life. This generally ends in more questions than answers. I'm starting this blog as a way to share what we discuss. I have no idea how often I'll post or what it'll be about. I'd just love to put something out in the world and get your take on our takes. Talk soon, Mitch ...