Like miles on a map

(Guest piece by Sun and Moon)

There is always a distance
Could you believe its family
Now I see there was so much before
Now that I see that I am dying
Dying dying but
Holding on
Through the mill
Still, daily this remains
and can you see?
You can see.
Its so obvious
how they keep
Or don’t keep
hitting the target
But they hit.
Though its known
There is always a distance, sadly
Like miles on a map
of roads that intersect
One hundred thousand miles
They go and come
To intersect
She has not so much grieved me
as she has grieved all of you
to some extent
Not to put it
Too severely
The words stand and,
I am mute.
I have died and I’m always dying.
Remembering everything
Giving both sides of the same coin,
forgiveness and grace
Im dying til Im living
Im not going to tell
anyone anymore
anything and
I am going to hell I think
Because I cursed her to hell right?
So there it is in my spirit disturbed
I have to live with that.
But Jesus forgave Peter
He can forgive me too.
So its a whole other poem about Grief
For another day
If youre not a monster then
Its easy to have my back
And have my back you will but
There is always a distance even
Without distance
Its there and its not
Intangible like traveling thoughts
That pass like landscapes past the glass
Like
Its always a show
Its always too much
Its always a test
Its never enough
There’s a lot of hate
What its become
Such a nice, quiet neighborhood but
Its fodder for fodder
Perpetual daughter
Nothing ever filled in the blank its
Just terrible terrible
How ones you love can be
And expectations crawl
And when one has my back
I hold onto theirs
For life but then
Then its over
They said its over
Its always been over
Theres always a distance.
You have to be careful
In falling grace, its time
To be humble
Peace seekers and
Tormented souls
That know freedom is something
You yearn for