Man's search for Godhood

Every man must juggle wolf pack ism and hive mind ism to survive in the world of today. This is why a set of instructions are so appealing: religious instruction, societal rules, social rules.

To extremize oneself as a hiver is to dedicate yourself to anthood, and its qualities. Ultimately remaining a celibate worker.

To extremize oneself as a pack member and leader is to independence. Ignorant of the weak, for the gain of the self, benefiting only those that benefit you.

To embrace the role of a hiver is to commit to the characteristics of humanity, and to remain a solitary worker, abstaining from mating. On the other hand, to fully embody the identity of a pack member and leader is to pursue independence, disregarding the concerns of the weak, and prioritizing personal gain, which ultimately benefits only those who are deemed advantageous to oneself.

Every man must continually juggle each or find himself rejected by society.

Strength is in wolfhood, and in weakness find themselves hoping in anthood. The wolf pack members, not leaders, can sway to anthood, in its neutrality. Hoping to sway the majority to it, more especially leaders. Leaders of a weak hive sway immediately to packism, its independence from the crowd and the signs and feelings of strength only justifiable.

A queen ant, or king and queen termites, are bound to the will and health of the hive, a wolf pack leader is independent from the health of any outside the pack and largely independent from the health of the pack, powerful in perspective of the pack, not entirely dependent on it like the royalty.

Powerful wolves demand a lack of care of themselves.

Wo is me. I wish I'd been taught to be a pack leader so i could be independent without further education. Instead i slave for the hive, trained in no alternative routes. A sacrifice.

But this must be wrong, instead it is the belief or teaching that I am an ant and only an ant and all wolfism is evil that I have rejected that cripples me.

I struggle in wolfism, overly Wolfy. And collapse in antism, a failure.

Reality demands a balance of both, while I demand the extreme of one. I have made the struggle personal. A vendetta to prove myself even when I am wrong.

Further it feels like a choice between father and mother, manhood and womanhood. Although I've seen the failure of my relatives and the insanity of this choice. The throwing of the table. My mother vehemently ant minded and my father vehemently wolf minded, no compromise other than in their own personal and hidden weaknesses.

I benefit nothing by struggling in this fight, for the world demands a balance of both. I struggle for normalcy. Seeing their independence of religion as their unifying factor, I see my own loneliness among strangers.

Religion cannot save us, this cycle will occur continually, and rebellion will also therefore be continual. But through genetic alteration, through access to genetic changes, structural saving. We can be free by virtues of changing ourselves fully.

Religion cannot save us, not all of us. The rebellion will remain, genetic change or replication by machine will free the hive.

To thin the crowd to become wolves, or to change the crowd to become hivers. The majority rules and the majority demands survival above all. The majority will survive by any means and the salve of structural/societal change of their weakness is heroism to their eyes. The community of those born by the machine will continually grow.

Gods they will not be, but hiveminded to their core they will. An ant will die for the cause, every ant. Ridding themselves of all threats. And the straggling survivors of their culling may be left independent, to develop once again.

Gods emerge from technological supremacy, and independence from instinct. Shall these ever be made?