Ritual

I bought a candle today, to honour the death of my consumer addiction.

Living in a city while working in a job that burned me out, consumerism became my vice. The money I earned was spent on distraction, hyper-palatable food, and general tat.

In my current sabbatical space, the urge to distract arrives during my deepest boredom.

Standard loop, I leave the house, I wander into the busy concrete. I convince myself "I need to get out!", which is valid. It does not take long for window shopping and charity shop trawls to bed into my psyche.

Lately, I find myself exhausted by the choice that the city sells me. Perhaps it's the reduction of income, but more so, I believe that my heart no longer needs to be numbed.

I strolled around retail spaces; nothing provided novelty. I spotted a candle on a store shelf costing £1. It called to me, not through novelty, but through an underlying need to find ritual.

This evening, I will cover my TV screen with a cloth, light the candle, burn incense, and read. Perhaps this will find me a place of presence, improve my sleep, but more importantly, allow me to rehabilitate from the consumerism that buried me for too long.