You Can't Be Too Careful

😘 After numerous interviews I finally found the perfect roommate and bodyguard. He is an extremely intelligent, super fit, cute, police officer. He has a license to shoot and kill any intruder that attempts to enter my home, and that is exactly what he will do. He also has the right to arrest anyone that looks even remotely suspicious, force them to provide their identity, fingerprint them, search their bags and devices, confiscate their items if necessary, interrogate them, and put them in jail. We nicknamed him The Terminator, because he won't hesitate to terminate any would-be transnational repressors, homophobic gay bashers, aggressive males that enjoy violence against women, kidnappers, thieves, or any other violent extremists that threaten our fundamental human rights. My new best friend is totally committed to protecting me and my girlfriends. We have the right to protect ourselves against violent extremists, and that is exactly what we will do. Sadly the US and EU governments are slacking in their duties to protect our fundamental human rights these days, so we have to do that ourselves. xo

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