December 6, 2022•292 words
The title of this essay might have made you think “Isn’t it obvious?”. But, how many of us have gone to a therapist when we faced a crisis? When we felt angry, stressed, or anxious? We never did. During such moments, we either think “This too will pass” or chug down a few beers assuming it will make us feel better.
I was no different. I never realized I had unprocessed grief from my dad’s death. I was suffering from anxiety and depression. Like all the others, I thought “This too shall pass”. But, even after five years, it didn’t pass.
Instead, it started affecting me even further. I got a wake-up call when I suffered a panic attack sometime last year. I thought my life was going to end. But, the doctor said it was ‘just’ a panic attack. After a lot of thinking, I started seeing a therapist.
I didn’t feel much difference during the first few sessions. But, I understood it was a slow process. Time went by and I started feeling better. I spoke my heart out during my sessions. I was angry, and honest, and discovered several unprocessed and unrealized feelings about my parents and childhood.
By the end of my six-month therapy process, I came to terms with my dad’s demise. I knew him better than when he was alive. After six years of struggle, I finally said goodbye to my father. If I had had that unprocessed grief any longer, it would’ve manifested into something toxic and would’ve made my life miserable. I’m happy that I took the step. A bold yet essential one.
Don’t worry about what others will say. Only you know what you’re going through. No one else does. So, don’t care.