The Bitter Pill

I'm losing sleep for losing you,
Crazy it seems yet it is true,
Nothing compares to the pain I'm feeling,
Fighting insomnia and silent weeping.

Disbelief is but another friend,
When you can't seem to make ends mend,
Telling myself, "soon this will end"
But time cannot be rushed, nor made to bend.

To forgive one's self is a beautiful virtue,
Preached on the altar, heard on the pew.
Yet let me know how to continue,
In a life of gloomy skies and greyish hue?

What I took then was a bitter pill,
A bomb on my waist that can be blown up at will.
My warnings were my plea for you to stop,
Yet when you said it, I called your bluff.

What we are now are just a million pieces of ourselves,
Shattered across the space that we share,
Yet, there's only one more thing for me left to do,
And it's to clean up the mess of what once was.

Friends I met both here and there,
Trying to get myself anywhere,
To escape the pain that I have caused,
To myself and to you, and what we've lost.

Yet in me, there is a glimmer of relief,
Now that I have found what freedom is this late.
I can now do what I so please,
Without arousing any anger, frustration, or hate.

This is my reflection now,
Now that we have reached this state,
I bid you farewell, and give you my bow,
Let us now carry on, with what we call faith.