Spanking & Caning Technique
July 26, 2025•1,287 words
Collated Reddit advice
Spanking Technique
Ignore most of the posts here, which are coming from inexperienced people. Key points:
The erotic zone is essentially the lower half of the ass. Think of your target as the part that contacts the chair when a guy is sitting upright. Draw an imaginary midline horizontally across his ass and hit below it 90 percent of the time, but stay above the leg break. Essentially, you're aiming at the meatiest part of the butt.
SLOW DOWN. The biggest mistake rookie tops make, by far, is going too fast. Doing that overwhelms the guy's synapses. You need to leave enough time between each lick for him to process the pain. Three seconds is the minimum, four or five seconds is not too long. Holding back that much when you're excited is actually hard to do, and it's a mark of skill.
Be aware of left-right balance. The far cheek will usually take far more abuse than the near cheek; the typical balance can be as bad as 70/30, in part because implements swung in an arc travel faster at the far end. Assuming you're right-handed and standing to his left, his right cheek will take maximum abuse. You have to consciously correct for it.
Diaper and wheelbarrow positions do not work. Neither does standing directly behind a guy and swinging forward; the far end of your implement or hand is landing on his kidneys in that case. By far the best positions involve you standing at a 90-degree angle to the guy and swinging across the horizontal plane of his buttocks. As mentioned, if you're right-handed you should be on his left most of the time. The exception would be if you learn to swing a belt or strap back-handed, in which case you can switch sides for a bit.
A belt is an excellent implement if you follow the rules above and aim it carefully. People who flail around with belts, hitting a guy all the way from his knees to his lower back, are idiots. The implement requires precision, and if you learn that, you can use it pretty hard.
Start at LOW INTENSITY. In fact, start much, much lower than you think you need to and gradually build the intensity. Most people's erotic pain threshholds start low, but as the endorphin flood starts their pain tolerance goes way, way up. Spending 20 or 30 minutes building up can pay huge dividends later in the scene.
Over-the-knee is an OK position starting out, but don't stick with it very long. The guy is too close to you when OTK, and it's nearly impossible to get the left-right balance correct. Best to use it as a starter position to establish who's boss, then quickly get beyond it.
The real key to this game is the psychology. If you keep the technical points above fresh in mind, then the real trick is to become the authority figure in the scene, which will make your sub want the punishment you are about to inflict. Don't overdo it, but speak in a firm voice, make him say "sir" when answering you, give him orders ("spread those legs wider, boy!") and so on. In other words, take control, and sound like you mean it.
The majority of gay men do NOT want to be feminized in a scene like this. Terms like "boy pussy" can be a real turnoff for the majority of guys, and so are feminine clothes. If your sub is an exception, you want to know ahead of time. On the other hand, the large majority of gay men DO like being age-regressed in these scenes, so "boy" and "young man" are usually good terms.
Again: SLOW DOWN.
I was paddled in high school locker room in the late 1980’s and coach paddled us bare butt. he was a pretty heavy hitter and gave anywhere between 5-25 licks depending on the offense and yout disciplinary history. A majority of male students were paddled. those licks felt like your butt was on fire, and sometimes tears were shed.
Fast forward—i am a spanker and have had more than a few novices over my knee. i give licks in sets of 10-15 and start with hand, then a bathbrush, followed by paddles. These are bare butt over my lap/knee. i start with a lick thats about force level 5 at a measured and steady pace. After boys butt is warmed up, i transition to paddles. After each set of licks, i rub his butt cheeks for a few minutes, that rubs out some of the stinging and burning, and helps build his endurance.
The greater force used and the faster the pace the greater the burning & stinging. Conversely, lesser force and slower pacing is less burning & stinging. have your spanker take it a little easier on your butt until its warmed up. i mention my high school days because they are an example that every man can take their butt being blistered because the hundreds of us who were paddled by that coach sure as hell didn’t want our butts being paddled. as a spanker, i have a policy that i don’t use any new implement on anyone else until its been test driven on my butt. and i get a periodic butt tuneup about every 3-4 months, so i know how it feels. DM me and ill send you a pic or two and some further info
Caning Technique
You need a high velocity. Use a flick of the wrist to get a satisfactory swooshing sound. Practice on a pillow. You don't need to use the elbow or shoulder for more power. The end of the cane moves fastest and should make good contact with the target. I use a medium cane, except when I want the punishment to look especially formidable.
It's best to have the subject bent over so as to present the target and prevent any stray strokes from doing damage. I prefer good support, such as bent over a chair or an elevated log. On a bed, you need to elevate the target area with some firm pillows beneath.
If you need to add more emphasis and you're beating bare skin, soak the cane beforehand. You can make some impressive marks if you cane over very tightly fitted *hosen* or shorts.
If you can control the cane well enough to make parallel stripes, finish with a couple diagonal strokes (bottom up and top down). Those should raise impressive welts where the lines intersect.
Try this: Set up a vinyl covered cushion vertically.
Spank it with your cane.
What you want to do is kind of a crack the whip motion. Your arm starting to slow about 8 inches before impact as your wrist snaps forward. If you practice with a yard stick, you will know when you have it right, as it will make a really solid "crack"
Secondly: Longer is not always better. Use a camera and slowmo to see how much bend is in your cane from air drag.
Thirdly: If you are using a willow switch, you need to experiment to find the optimum tip diameter. Too thin, and it has no impact. to thick and it's all thud.
My current thinking on this is that a willow switch that is between 2.5 and 3 feet long with a tip diameter between 3/16 and 1/4 inch is effective.
Note also that a fencing sabre (not the epee) will raise fine welts.