Sunday, 24 Sept 2023

OK, Assalamualaikum. So, I went out with Asyraf and Adi for lunch, and I pretty much was analyzing things. But I was mainly analyzing social skills. I did notice three things, actually. I was oddly quiet, very, very quiet, by the way. Yeah, I don't know why. I just pretty much shut down. I think last time I mentioned that when there are three people, including myself, I would struggle to make small talk or just talk in general, but okay. Regardless of that, I was oddly quiet. I don't know why.

So, the first thing that I learned... I observed is that when somebody starts the conversation, you can do one of these two things. Well, not only one of these two things, but you can do many other things. There are many ways to extend and further the conversation. One thing that I noticed, one of them, actually Adi, what he did was when somebody talked about something, the way he showed more interest in that specific topic is he made an example specific/related to what the other person is talking about, in order to spark curiosity. So that's one technique that I can use in my social skills.

The other one (done by Asyraf), this is how you ensure people are included and don't feel left out. I wouldn't call it a rhetorical question; you ask a question that doesn't have a clear-cut answer. No. I'm not saying it doesn't involve facts. I mean, it's just like a question that ignites some of your... I mean, it involves you in sharing your opinion to answer that question. It's kind of like a thought-provoking question. It's like a question that would spark your curiosity. It will require your opinion about the specific question, as it doesn't really have a specific true or false answer. It's not a yes or no question. It's an open-ended question where you can just chime in. So yeah, those are the two things that I noticed from both of them. One thing is you extend the conversation by making an example specific to that conversation topic, and the other one is you start the conversation by asking an open-ended question. It's not a yes or no question.

So usually when I want to extend the conversation, it's pretty much like, "Why? What? Why don't you do that? How did you do it?" It's like pretty much boilerplate basic questions. But this one is like, "Oh, okay, this question is interesting. Maybe I should chime in and just give my opinion on it." So that's the art of, I think, extending a conversation. Yeah. And the other half of having a conversation, obviously, is how to answer questions. I did notice I can be dismissive, but yeah, I will be better at it for sure. And that is just one thing that I noticed. Even though the lunch lasted maybe 2-3 hours, I think, it's nice that I can still learn some new things from that three-hour lunch. Other than that, yeah. See you later. Bye.

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