How to be a good friend and communicator

Sometimes I find it difficult to communicate well with other people, but here are some tips I've gathered from personal experience, watching YouTube videos, and reading Charles Duhigg's "Supercommunicators"

• I downloaded an app called “Birthdays” that sends me notifications on the days of my friends’ birthdays. If we are particularly close I try to give them a gift
• communication and being upfront is important and avoiding confrontation will not get you anywhere
• boundaries should be respected and not crossed, otherwise trust cannot be built. This is especially applicable to male friends
• you shouldn’t feel jealous of your friends or constantly compare yourself to them. You should feel genuinely happy for their achievements because they don’t undermine your own
• Sometimes I find having guy friends difficult. Unfortunately, most of my closest friends at school are guys because I've known them the longest (the female friends I know the longest go to different high schools). Most of them are incredibly nice but I really appreciate female friendships. I hope people don’t think I’m a pick-me girl if I hang out with the guys, I just didn’t know who else to hang out with at the time…
• If you are insecure about something don't bring your friend down or blame them about it. Don't be afraid to be vulnerable and tell your friends the truth and what you're feeling. If they are good friends, they should be able to understand.
• Don't yap about yourself and dominate the conversation. Give other people a chance to talk as well. If you think "you guys are so quiet I'm just trying to start a conversation", maybe consider that it's because we don't have a chance to talk. Whenever I realize I'm yapping too much I try to address it and say "sorry I've been yapping too much, [insert question about the other person]
• The most charismatic people are the most secure in themselves. If you are insecure you tend to talk about yourself a lot because you need other people to listen and validate you. If you have moved on past needing other people's validation, you will find less need to talk about yourself and have more curiosity to get to know the other person
• Sharing personal stories at the right times is key to building trust
• At the end of the day people will forget about what you said, but never about how you made them feel. So made other people feel appreciated, listen to, and that you care about them truly.
• Think about what the conversation is truly about. Do they need empathy and for you to rant along with them, or do they need solid advice?