Am Not Defined by Anyone [SC]
June 9, 2022•319 words
[Stream of Consciousness - SC]
Feeling down seeing other post about achievement!
There are five groups working in five different agriculture cooperatives under CPSA.
In the last two days, I have seen two posts about one of the groups having successfully signed two buy-and-sell contracts with their customers while my team has not made any progress in the last 2 weeks. In addition, I found about an agriculture cooperative in Battambang called Tasey. They are doing vegetable production business, and it is going really well.
Seeing these kind of things, I start to compare myself to them. It makes me unhappy and feel down. All the negative and doubtful voices just got to me.
It goes on like this, "I don't know what is going to happen with the cycling campaign idea next year...", "I don't what other people might think about my Dassatek content...", "Look at what the agriculture cooperative in Battambang is doing. They're making great impacts. They're doing really well. I don't know if my idea is going to be as good as them...", "Look at the other team. They have signed two contracts already...", "What are these people going to think about me if I can't find the market for the lemongrass project. I am the one who Bong Kimhun or other people normally praise, and in the end I can't achieve what they expected of me."...
At the same time, I try remind myself that I am doing what I am doing to prove anyone anything. I am doing what I do because I want to do it. I have my own dream and goals. I have my own life vision. I have my own visualization of how I want to live my life. I AM NOT DEFINED BY ANYONE OPINION ON ME. In the end, it is my life and my own evolution. I was born alone and I will also die alone.