April 8, 2021•234 words
The self is not a fixed object/entity but a process. The emergent, uninterrupted flow of universal harmony expressed, in our case, through what appears as a human form.
If authentic expression of this process impairs the meeting of physical, emotional and psychological needs in childhood, the energy flow is interrupted and redirected in contrived ways more suitable to the environment which serve the purpose of manipulating perception and situations in order to ensure the safety and survival of the organism. The resulting behaviours continue into adulthood, at which point one has a learned diminished capacity to allow authentic expression to unfold. This leads one to experience a false sense of self based on observation of contrived behaviours.
Since all process is interconnected and interdependent, this experience must be part of the nature of the overall self/whole, as is the discovering and settling into the awareness of it. There is nothing personal in any of it. It is happening. Pride and arrogance, shame and regret, all are a result of misidentification based on interpretations of what occurs - the idea in this case that "I am doing this".
You are not doing anything. It makes more sense to say that it is happening through you. That it is you.
However, we can continue to respond to the world as if we were the doer of what unfolds, holding the paradox and maintaining "both/and" awareness within.