oct26

There's a thought that keeps coming back to me - "everything in the world disappoints".

It's something I keep noticing. Whenever I get or do something that I've been craving or fantasizing about, it ends up being disappointing. It can be something as simple as wanting to eat a specific food or something as complex as a relationship, activity or experience. Once I get or do the thing, at best it tends to be fine but rarely if ever as enjoyable, satisfying or fulfilling as I thought it'd be.

I'm not sure whether this is part of the human condition, a result of my own qualities or just a natural result/growing cynicism from going for the wrong things. Maybe a bit of each. I do suspect that the majority of things and experiences available are essentially scams. Most of my decisions are likely the results of decades of targeted marketing, media influence, even hormonal/bacterial fluctuations in the body. The mind is filled with images of pleasure, fun, satisfaction and fulfilment that reality rarely, if ever, measures up to.

Everything in the world disappoints is, I think, a thought that mostly comes when I've done or gotten something somehow out of alignment with my real overall nature and needs. When I've instead succumbed to the influence of misleading conditioning/programming in some way. Conditioning that compels me to look in all the wrong places for satisfaction. The world of man is full of scams.