Dead Adult | Tu 11/8

I woke up surprisingly tired given how I got nearly 8 hours of sleep. Maybe it's the sickness. My pacing for the morning was a little slow so I was a bit late to work, which was stressful in the moment. Thankfully I'm not being tracked, and Sam even came in later than me. The morning was filled with meetings: with Sam to discuss expectations for me and topics to read about, with the team observing their stand up and office hours, and with a few of my teammates from training during lunch. I have no more meetings for today and got a good amount of small tasks done, but I'm starting to get a bit tired. If this is working life I can see how it gets old fast.

Okay the tiredness is ramping up. I'm trying to be doing something all the time, but the body is uncooperative. The job sounds pretty chill though. Sam said he isn't the type to micromanage and just wants me to deliver what I promise. He also told me that I joined at a good time since teams will probably get scrambled around soon and everyone will be getting used to each other. He also told me that I'll only be coding 10-20% of the time and that most of my job is learning and meetings. I guess I'll try to stay curious and hopefully things are as lax as Sam says they'll be.

Eventually James messaged me when he saw my BeReal in the office. It turns out he wanted to come in for most of this week and stopped by to hang out for a bit. I was down to chill and walk around since I wasn't doing anything urgent, so we went on a little adventure. James took me to the coffee machines on the other end of the floor where he works, but on the 6th floor, and I got a completely good enough hot chocolate. The office even keeps milk and creamer stocked for free, so I'm tempted to try every drink that the machine can make. Who said the office had to be boring? We also went down to the 2nd floor and he showed me the small nooks and seating areas where he usually works from when he comes into the office. It was empty and tempted me to try working out of there since my neighborhood of the office is lively and can be tiring, but I probably can't justify being away from my team when I'm in office. James also took me to the 6th floor where his assigned desk is and the area was half empty as if it was a Friday or something. As much as I think the busy floor can be tiring, I think the ghost town would make things even more boring.

Hanging out with James was rejuvenating and we decided to go home around 4:30, but traffic already got bad by then. I planned on getting gas and take the tollway home, but decided to stock up on things from Sam's Club if I was already coming for gas and would have to be in traffic regardless. I figured the drive would be longer than the morning's, but my soul wasn't ready for what I would experience after work. The gas filling experience may have been the worst of my life (witnessed the person in front of me fumbling with the pump and card only to be told that she can't use it without a membership, the person after me honking me to move up and refusing to go around me when I pulled into the "back" pump) and it had me ready to snap already. This made traffic on the tollway slowly boil me like an egg. By the time I came home I felt too exhausted to do anything. If this is what working life is like, I'm already sick of it.

Back home I unpacked the groceries, ate dinner, and realized I need to beat traffic for my sanity. I also found out that the American Football house is in Urbana, near Campus Oaks and ISR, which is insane. I wish I could've visited it, but I guess even the fact that I lived nearby is cool enough.

I can't believe it, but I just got the idea to ask Sammy to be rave baes again with the qualification that "what happens at Slander stays at Slander". I must really miss her. I must also be a monster.

I just laid in bed and drifted off with the lights on from like 9 to 2. My life is fading before my eyes.

Also I just checked and my first meeting tomorrow is at 8 am, but I have back to back meetings until 10:30. I don't think I can pull the "do stand up remotely then come into work" so I may just come in early and leave early. I would prefer to be remote for the day with a schedule like that, but I said I'd be in office. I saw Nicole bring her breakfast and eat at her desk, so I may do the same. I will of course also be enjoying that hot chocolate.