Comfortable Ambiguity

You know, I've been thinking a lot lately about how we connect with each other. It's funny – we're more "connected" than ever through our phones and social media, but sometimes it feels like we're struggling to really hear each other.

The other day, I was having coffee with a friend, and I caught myself doing that thing where I was just waiting for my turn to talk instead of really listening. It hit me: how often do we actually have genuine conversations anymore?

I think part of the problem is this pressure we feel to always have an opinion on everything. Social media doesn't help – it's like we're all trying to curate these perfect versions of ourselves online. But let's be real, none of us have it all figured out.

There's this philosopher I love, Alain de Botton (yeah, I'm name-dropping, bear with me). He talks about how important it is to embrace the messy, complicated parts of being human. And you know what? I think he's onto something.

It reminds me of this workshop I attended led by an ex-FBI negotiator, Chris Voss. He was all about really trying to understand where the other person is coming from, instead of just seeing things as black and white. It got me thinking – what if we applied that kind of thinking to our everyday conversations?

I've been trying to be more comfortable with saying "I don't know" or "I'm not sure how I feel about that." It's not easy – there's this weird gut reaction like I should always have an answer. But I've noticed that when I admit I'm uncertain, it often leads to much more interesting and genuine conversations.

Look, I'm not saying I've got it all figured out. Far from it. But I'm trying to create spaces in my life where it's okay to not have all the answers. Whether it's a deep chat with a close friend or a discussion in my book club, I'm working on being more open to different perspectives and comfortable with ambiguity.

It's a work in progress, but I think it's worth it. Because at the end of the day, isn't that what we all want? To be heard, to connect, to feel like we're not alone in this messy, confusing human experience?

So here's my challenge to you (and to myself): Next time you're in a conversation, try embracing the uncertainty. Ask questions. Really listen. You might be surprised at where it leads you.