June 8, 2020•235 words
Woah. What a weekend. One of the worst, but ultimately the best since a long time.
For various reasons, it was just hard. I couldn't really get myself to do anything in any aspect of my life. It was the true epitome of feeling bad, knowing what caused it, but doing considerably little to change it. Well, happens.
At the end of the weekend I got a chance to have a real, honest conversation. Something I kind of lacked during the past few months - let's be honest: opening up via Zoom is just not as easy as face-to-face.
This weekend made me realize that I'm in desperate need of a thorough mental cleaning. That I've been speeding ahead all of this time, while dealing with all the troubles quarantine has brought upon us. Maybe that was my coping mechanism: over-achieving.
Rest is important. I never doubted that. Yet I seem to be very often ignoring it's importance. Thinking hell, I'm gonna get through this no matter what. Only to soon realize this approach is incredibly unsustainable and leads to quick and dramatic burnout.
This week, I'm taking a break. An unplanned one, so a bit difficult to pull off. But hopefully it'll be a good one.
I'm hoping to write longer, deeper posts. We'll see how that goes - right now my brain is still in the "calming and untangling" phase.