I'm glad I started sharing these thoughts. When I'm keeping everything to myself it's easy to get into a headspace where I start thinking I'm smarter than I am. Often once they're out there I'm able to more clearly see my limitiations. I do the same thing most people seem to - piecing together mishmashes of experiences, knowledge and insights and thinking I've got more figured out than I really do. The tricky thing is that I tend to occupy myself with higher knowledge, which puts me at a greater risk of getting a big head and mistaking mental complexity for insight.

After listening to myself and then to people who are actually wise, I can clearly see my own immaturity and lack of thorough understanding. The difference seems to be more a matter of experience than anything - these people are older and have simply been through more, while I still seem to get caught up in this semi-youthful arrogance that can cloud my perception. I certainly don't think that all older people have outgrown that but I have yet to come across someone who struck me as truly wise under the age of about 50. Younger people can occasionally be surprisingly thoughtful and insightful but that insight tends to be ungrounded, unrefined and disjointed. The real deals have all been elders. Youthful and lively with childlike gleams in their eyes perhaps, but elders nonetheless.

So it looks like I've got a long way to go before I really know what's what. Oh well - what's the rush? Why try to be wise before my time? I'll just keep stumbling forward. Might as well embrace and enjoy my time to be a fool.

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