surrendering

I wonder sometimes, once one starts the process of disengaging from the false/programmed self and its mechanisms of control and manipulation, whether all the things gained and sustained by it need to be surrendered and returned?

It's something that I consider at times I may be going through. I see it in a way as "surrendering my ill-gotten gains". Particularly when it comes to the money/material possessions and the relationships that involved people-pleasing and other fearful/codependent/controlling patterns. There seems to be a real component of moving through the fear and grief of allowing it all to go back to where it rightfully belongs - out of my hands. This happens gradually as I stop acting out the old dynamics and beliefs.

I suppose I can only hope that this is making room for what is rightfully mine to have - what truly comes into resonance with my authentic/surrendered self expressions and actions. Whatever and whoever "wants" to come to me and chooses to be with me, without me trying to force and control things by speaking or acting out of conditioned fear-based programming.

Maybe nothing tangible will come. That's a possibility. But I'm confident that something more sustaining and valuable will expand to fill that space nonetheless, which I suppose would be something along the lines of love/God/truth/trust/inner peace. I'll just have to wait and see.