2019-10-04 Looking back, I'm not a computer

Just go offline. There is no need for the cloud for anything. Why the need to share across platforms? This is the safest way to type. Store everything on a single text file happy days. It's more about the process than the actual storage of what you write.

Write, just write, worry bout what you are writing about. Except you won't. But maybe you will. Only on your deathbed. Did I write too much, no enough. But did I live? Ain't that the truth? Did I actually live? Or spend my whole life thinking, texting, looking at my phone and worrying.

Be bold. ..... Honestly, just be bold with your life. Enjoy it, live it and love it. Don't look at other people, just roll with what you have. Ignore material things. Self publish. Look forwards.

I think the reason I want to document my life, is because my memory is fucked. The internet and computers will remember every bit, byte an terabyte of what I did. My memory is fucked. I can barely remember what I did last week, let alone 10 years ago. I keep getting flashbacks of my life from wayback, like 10-15 years. Fuzzy memory Deja Vu things. It makes me sad. I'm not sure writing or photography will help. Maybe my memory is just fucked. That's the probelme with working around computers all your life. You expect your brain to work the same way as a hard drive. It doesn't. Oh well.

I think I've always looked forward, now I'm thinking about looking back. I'm not wired to look back, it makes me sad.


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