Note 44

I am currently in class. I am interested yet also not interested at all. It's like I want to know this information but the way the professor approaches the material is as if we are children. Perhaps I am a child. I mean, I'm literally not paying attention to a lecture that I paid for. That level of idiocy would likely only be found in children. Right?

I haven't found an internship, and my plans for the summer are pretty wide open. I'm honestly so lost. Maybe I should write my thoughts more often, but it honestly seems like nothing really changes in my life. I just continue to make worse decisions. I feel as if doing more school would be beneficial. Maybe something will change after getting my masters. But if I'm being honest, that seems unlikely. In every stage of life, it seems the same so far. I have to apply for high school, apply for college, apply for jobs, all just to really gain nothing from the experience.

In any case, all climate change scientists are saying that the earth will burn up in about 50 years, so in the end is there a purpose to it all? I should just live doing what I enjoy.