Note 61

I've come kinda (?) full circle, well maybe part of the circle. A small arc of the circle perhaps. To say that I'm okay with coding. I don't really plan on doing much with it outside of work. It's just something I'm not particularly invested in. Maybe as a side project if there's something I'd really like to build or a script to do something helpful once in a while. But honestly, it's just work for me.

See, I'd like to think I have passions but looking at them more closely I'm not sure I really do. I have things I like and enjoy, but now I'm not sure I enjoy them so deeply that I would give up my job to pursue these passions if given the opportunity. I'd like to. But I think part of me is hesitant because it's not easy to just give something up for something that's not certain. But I suppose that's what a lot of people felt before taking that plunge so they gave up a lot of their free time and had many a sleepless night to do so.

Maybe part of that is taking the plunge. To really give it a concerted effort. Because genuinely what else is there. What more is there to this life than to give an effort to the things I'm spending time on. Maybe continuing to worry and overthink these things is just the main issue. Sometimes I think the best things I've done have come where I don't think too hard and just do. Maybe this is one of those.