Jay's Journal #100days

@jaym

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#100Days, Day 16

I made it. I got through the short week, and today was by far the busiest day I've had in months. So much to do today to insure a guilt-free 5 days off, but it all got done.

Well, there's always a chance I missed something, but since I don't know what that is, it's guilt-free because I won't know until I got back to work next Wednesday.

It was a huge relief to be done for the day. Usually, the day before a vacation or a holiday weekend, people cut out a little early to get a head start on their weekend. I wish that was the case for me, that wasn't meant to be.

I had an appointment with my psychiatrist today that I'd forgotten about, until I got a reminder from his office yesterday. And, it was in the afternoon, so I had to leave the office early, go see him, then come back home and finish everything I didn't get to finish before having to leave.

So, I got home around 4pm, and worked until about 5:30, then called it a day. Hardly an "early" start to my long weekend. In fact, my wife got home before I was done for the day, and that almost never happens.

Oh well, I'm off now and it feels fantastic!

My visit with my shrink went really well. I was in the best mood I'd been in for the past several visits. And, a big difference from when I was at the worst of my anxiety and depression relapse.

I just felt good... felt upbeat, well rested, not angry or frustrated. I even shared with him that lately I haven't been hating Sundays as I dread Mondays. I also told him that I'm writing every day, and how that really helps. More than I realized that it would or could.

It seems that my plan to pursue a path that I've been wanting to for some time (proessional copy and business/technical writing) has also been a healthy pursuit for me. It's got me focused on more positive outcome for my life and career.

I'm in a pretty good place right now, with work, with home, marriage, friendships, etc. Just talking with him today, I felt so good, so energized, and full of hope. Pretty much the exact polar opposite of how I felt even a few months ago.

Again, busy, busy, followed by a great visit with my doc, then busy again... but the thing is, I felt like I was really effective today. Like I contributed some tangible results to my work project, but also to myself. I was useful, and really in my zone.

There's no better feeling than that, and now I get to enjoy a nice 5 day break. I can't remember the last time I was this content. Sure feels good.

See you tomorrow.


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