Note 778

I'm going to sue big tobacco for false advertising when I don't get cancer. If I've been smoking for 60 years and I'm still not dead, I expect compensation [my retirement plan]. They've been exploiting smokers for years now with their false cancer advertisements. Many of these paying customers aren't even dying of smoking related illnesses. It's all a ploy to keep us alive longer so that they can make more money off of us. And now they have vaping, because nothing screams badass like sucking on an electronic penis that ejaculates bubble gum flavoured cum clouds into your mouth. They say vaping is 99% safer than smoking, which is fucking typical of this day and age, where even the cancer is fake.

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