Birchoparenthesis

This is of a blogger's fears and motivations... and support for his Morning Pages practice. Radiant thinking, brain illness survivor... Topics include luxury goods, video games, spirituality, personal tech, writing ink...

My Notes on Sunday at Internet beats 41, afternoon

Stationery Reflections I recently ran out of loose leaf notebook paper, so I’ve retreated to online shopping. Truthfully, I have a real fondness for hardcover notebooks from France and China—in fact, I already have quite a hoard of them. While browsing online, I discovered a few manufacturers that produce heavier paper specifically designed for liquid ink. I’ve added those to my cart, along with some disc-bound ring binders. I also need to rummage through my lifetime supply of writing ink to fi...
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Art of M. Pelosi versus My Intent of Doodling

Distinguishing between the act of doodling and the creation of fine art reveals fundamental differences in training, intent, and the resulting aesthetic product. Traditionally, the formal training of an artist culminates in the production of works with recognized cultural or economic value; these works often prioritize the generation of provocative ideas over mere aesthetic appeal. In contrast, doodling is typically characterized as a private endeavor—an exercise in self-amusement or cognitive p...
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Friday, at beats Internet time 167, nighttime

I’m honestly feeling unusual low-low‑motivation right now. I’ve was using caffeine as a stand‑in with my typical low motivation, so now it is a slump. I don’t want to keep wailing and moaning online. I haven’t smiled much today—maybe twice at most. On the bright side, thinking about a new dog, which is a small hope. In reality, a big change isn’t possible right now. So I’m thinking about getting a super‑thin, high‑end smartphone. It might give me a short‑term “consumer high,” but I’ll probably ...
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Smile Every Day

I’ve realized I could use a bit more social interaction—more real conversations and shared laughter. I received some tough news regarding a close friend’s health recently, which has been heavy. However, I’m keeping my outlook positive. I make a conscious effort to smile several times a day, and I’ve found that it genuinely lifts my mood. ​The Home Front The house is definitely due for a deep clean! At our current pace, it doesn't look like it'll happen overnight, but it’s on the radar. ​The B...
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Caffeine Dependence

Journey to Balanced Energy I’ve realized that my relationship with caffeine has reached a tipping point. While my smartwatch shows I’m getting enough hours of sleep, my deep sleep—the restorative kind—is consistently low. To fix this, I am beginning a "titration" process: a gradual, disciplined reduction of my daily intake until I reach a sustainable limit of just two cups. As my counselor encouraged me, "You’ve done it before," and that reminder gives me the confidence to succeed again. The S...
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Tuesday, at Internet beats 189 nighttime

I’ve been curious about the ikko "mind phone" that recently swept the internet through various articles and videos. At the same time, I’ve noticed Apple enthusiasts heralding the rumored iPhone Air as a pure expression of the Apple philosophy. As a writer, this still intrigues me, especially as I search for a device that offers faster performance than my Samsung Galaxy S22. On the hardware side, I recently rediscovered my Instax LiPlay camera. While it’s still functional, the firmware is outdate...
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Monday at Internet beat time 198, nighttime

The "Emotional Support Dumpster Fire" I recently saw a clever kit to crochet called an "Emotional Support Dumpster Fire" featuring a sign that reads, "Everything is just fine." The irony of the sign is what really gives it meaning; it reminds me of the coffee mug at the pharmacist station used during the pandemic that said, "I’m fine. It’s all fine. Everything is just fine." I’m considering heading back to the discount site where I saw it to see if it’s still available. A Break from the Appl...
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Sunday at 565 Internet beat time, pre-dawn

Predawn and writing at home. Typing the blog entry rather than using handwriting. The best way to accomplish handwriting recognition, that one found, is to run it through the AI chatbot engine. It is good and accurate often. So that replaced my Moleskine smartpen for a lot of reasons. The main one is that one doesn't like to write with ink‑paste ballpoint on paper with that smartpen. Rather, one prefers liquid ink to write and one of the 100 fountain pens. Yesterday one took a journey to the edg...
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Sedley Men's Perfume

Enjoying Sedley, a men’s fragrance from Perfumes de Marly, I decided to compare it with another citrus‑green opening scent for men—Salvatore Ferragamo Pour Homme. In Sedley, the green character comes from a menthol note, whereas Salvatore Ferragamo Pour Homme introduces green‑fig leaf. From that point onward the two diverge: Sedley feels richer and heavier, thanks to its resinous undertones. Perfumes de Marley is renowned for “sillage monsters” that dominate a room. In my case, the effect was ...
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Ninja Foodi Air Fryer Toaster Oven

Ninja Foodi Air Fryer Toaster Oven – \$200 USD. (discount purchase) I’m really enjoying this appliance—it’s a great deal. Out of the ten preset functions, I usually stick to four: Toast, Air Fry, Rapid Bake, and Griddle. I’ve used it for toast, vegetables, steak, and seafood. I’ve nearly ruined it twice: once by overheating it while trying to broil a thick steak, and another time by slamming the door shut too hard. In both cases the unit recovered after I unplugged it and let it cool down. R...
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Vintage Film Camera

I received a vintage keychain 110 film camera today. The engineering looks incredible! So far, the shutter works well with a disposable film cartridge. If I can successfully get photos out of it, I may later try a Lomography brand 110 camera, which costs about $100 USD. ​I wanted to test the shutter, but I was afraid of damaging the plastic, keychain-sized camera by firing it without a cartridge inside. This camera is quite primitive in its concept, with no shutter or lens adjustments, but I thi...
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Tuesday Night

Amazingreen Perfume I bought this perfume a long time ago on the gray market. The bottle is beautiful—true to the CdG style and made of mirrored, green glass. To my nose, the scent is pure genius: woods, some aromatics, and then… a green pepper note. It has that signature CdG touch where they create a note that "busts through." The pepper carries like a head note but acts like a base note. It truly is one of the best perfumes in my book. Switching Back to Android I’m heading back to Android. I...
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_ Pardon _ Perfume

Nasomatto’s Absinthe fragrance left a lasting impression, and so when browsing online at a gray‑market outlet I encountered Pardon, a highly regarded scent from the same house. I decided to purchase Pardon as a holiday self‑gift. In character it resembles Gucci Pour Homme v. 1, yet diverges markedly: where that Gucci scent leans toward sweet, spicy accords, Pardon introduces a nuanced chocolate‑tar facet. The opening is strikingly potent since Pardon is concentrated parfum, though the dry‑down ...
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Sunday, Jan 11, 2026 at 6:57 PM

_Gratitude list:_ 🟢 Wise elders – Their guidance keeps me grounded, especially when my brain health challenges threaten to overwhelm me. 🟢 Secure home in a genteel neighborhood – It may not always feel completely comfortable, but it offers the safety I need. 🟢 Writing outlets – I publish on my blog and contribute to health‑focused sites that provide the information I rely on. 🟢 Overall health – I’m able to move, sleep, eat, and take care of all the essentials for a good, fulfilling life. ...
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Writing Together and Alone

It is a strange and lovely phenomenon that several of us analog writers—those of us who still prefer handwriting on paper with ink—share this space. Here at my favorite haunt, we huddle, both alone and together, in the rare and diffuse winter sunlight. The spot is a store with a stunning two-story glass wall. On this Saturday morning, being studious writers, we don’t acknowledge one another. I seem to be the only curious person wanting to observe my compatriots at the bar: two women and a man. ...
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Instax Pal Digital Camera

Core Attributes * Ease of Use: Handy and easy to operate. * Creative Value: Offers unique features for creative photography. * Software: The app interface is conspicuous and distinct. * Form Factor: Compact and portable, though it lacks a traditional zoom. User Experience I purchased an open-box Instax Pal digital camera at a great price and I’m having a lot of fun with it. Given the "cute" graphics and the sense of animism in its design, it seems marketed toward a younger or more femi...
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Chinese Fountain Pen Conversion

Picked up a Chinese fountain pen where its shipping cost exceeded that of the plastic pen. I used beeswax from burnt candles to seal the pen, allowing it to hold 10 mg of liquid ink—a surprisingly large amount. Another, similar Chinese fountain pen I converted in a like manner fell apart, but an AI service revealed the technique for applying beeswax to the seal of this more recent one. My next pen project might be of an even sturdier acrylic model from China. Because my cheaper pen holds so muc...
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Bean Soup

I used an AI‑powered search engine and put in it a list of what I had in the fridge, and it returned a recipe. Fortunately, I had already bought several aromatics—carrots, onions, and celery—which the AI refers to as the flavor base. The recipe specified the order in which to cook the ingredients, along with a pound of pinto beans that I purchased at the store. The beans have been simmering on the stove for a while now. Meanwhile, the potatoes are diced and waiting, and I’ve sautéed the aromati...
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Waystation for Writing

People often say that once you’re retired and well into your golden years, it’s a good thing to stay home. After all, at 80 years old, venturing out can increase the risk of catching a virus or encountering other mishaps, so it’s understandable why many seniors prefer the comfort of their own homes. But if you still have plenty of energy—and perhaps a touch of the younger‑generation spirit—getting out becomes essential. My favorite spot outside the house is the local convenience store, which d...
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Monday at 7:58 PM #30days writing Challenge

Over  100 days consecutively, writing on my blog has been a soothing outlet for my odd thoughts during the writing challenge. I’ve discovered several new writers on Listed.to, and I’m planning to shift to another #30days writing challenge there. I’ve also been using “offloading” to jot down irrational fears before bedtime. While many of these fears are implausible or inconsequential, the practice helps clear my mind. Today I attended an online art‑video session hosted by a local arts‑education...
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Checking in with Listed.to 🎉100/100 ( #100days writing challenge)

1/1/26: Milestone Reached Today marks the end of my 100-day blogging challenge. While the goal was to write and to publish on each of 100 days continually, the habit itself felt natural and rewarding. The Positives: Consistency: I successfully developed a daily "writing for publication" habit. Creative Momentum: This challenge jump-started my process for generating new ideas moving forward. Community: I enjoyed reading fellow emerging writers on Listed.to. Gratitude: The blog served as a me...
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Wednesday at 7:32 PM 99/100 ( #100days writing challenge)

Today was pretty good, even though I didn't sleep very well last night. I had plans to go across town to meet with my counselor, and I'm glad I did. The meeting went really well because I think highly of my counselor, and she seems to think the same of me. We had a lot of laughs and enjoyed her adorable therapy dog, who kept us entertained. Overall, it was a great day! With the holiday shopping in full swing, my porch has been busy with delivery guys dropping off packages. Luckily, all the packa...
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Dim and Downbeat Holiday Past 98/100 ( #100days writing challenge)

I overheard a coffee‑shop employee mutter, “I’m traumatized by retail,” after a customer asked whether he celebrated the holidays. That comment made me think about how my own childhood, spoiled with presents, still fuels a longing for the wonder—and the chaos—of the season. Perhaps that’s why I bought countless little gifts for myself this year, losing track of them as I went. What began with practical items soon turned into a splurge on expensive sneakers that I’ll probably end up returning. I...
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Morning Jaunt; Then the Shop 97/100 ( #100days writing challenge)

The best part of my week was a weekday morning—Monday, to be exact. I slept exceptionally well and set out for the neighborhood café‑convenience store. The coffee was strong and delicious, and the barista played obscure, artistic tunes that filled the space with a sonorous vibe. The music sparked my creativity, and I felt energized by the caffeine. Even though the weather was frigid, the rain wouldn't arrive for a few more days; it was cold and clear. With my mind buzzing, I began doodling befo...
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Sunday, Dec 28, 2025 at 6:58 PM 96/100 ( #100days writing challenge)

Forgot my online meeting for my brain‑illness support group today. Maybe the day was still good. I wrote a lot, but my process is too time‑consuming—though I enjoy it. It’s time‑consuming because I like doing my morning pages the old‑fashioned way: handwriting with ink on paper. Then I feel bad if they don’t get uploaded to the Journal app. I stayed home most of the day with my housemate, who rested. We watched cat videos and ate a big steak for dinner, so it was a peaceful time. I still want a...
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Want of a Soul Chariot 95/100 ( #100days writing challenge)

What I’m curious about is how talented artists achieve success—their methods, habits, and pathways. While working in corporations, I observed what it takes to grow a business and witnessed both clear signs of success and the subtle steps that enable it. Living with a chronic brain illness is a major handicap for me. My insight is limited, my motivation often wanes, and I lack the originality that M. Pelosi displays in her drawings. Discipline is another area where I fall short. Consequently, I’...
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Moby-Dick -Almost Finished Reading 94/100 ( #100days writing challenge)

I’m still enjoying Moby‑Dick. I love the asides of the narrator. The action was good and compelling. This writer thinks that the novel is not psychological in its plot, but it is the virtuoso performance of the narrator that matters. The splendid feat of language by Melville is the main takeaway for this reader of Moby‑Dick. Of course, the novel is also a monument to the sperm‑whale species. Secondary to that, the novel records the culture of the whalemen who hunted the sperm whale. Moby‑Dick ...
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My Idea Blockage After Pelosi's Art 93/100 ( #100days writing challenge)

My inspiration was Marilena Pelosi, an artist. I wanted to understand her mind and emulate her meaning‑creation process, so I drew for a month in her style. She goes into a trance and generates otherworldly, tense settings—by her disciplined lines and flat colors. She is possibly a brilliant thinker, based on the cubist awareness I have tried to grasp regarding her motivation and history. Trying to understand her work, I drew every day for thirty days. Looking back on that book in which I drew ...
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Three Coffee Shops for Fun 92/100 ( #100days writing challenge)

What are my favorite activities to accomplish on a day off? Why are they favorites of mine? Our town is full of wonderful coffee shops, so I decided to go "cafe hopping." It felt so liberating to move from place to place. I visited three different shops, using the time to work on my "morning pages." I hit my daily goal of 750 words, pouring my thoughts onto the page while soaking in the atmosphere of cafe society. ​I’ll admit, it wasn’t the healthiest morning—I treated myself to an expensive ...
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Tuesday, Dec 23, 2025 at 5:59 PM 91/100 ( #100days writing challenge)

I’m “jonesing” for a new smartphone—yes, that’s the word, even though I don’t usually such slang. After getting through the worst of the holiday resentment, it feels like the right moment for another self‑presie ritual. Before indulging in a new purchase, I wanted to write. My housemate has been sleeping most of the day and night, which looks like depression. I talked with a psychologist today, and it was helpful. We compared the situation to John the Baptist, noting that he shared some traits...
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