Eulalie

I haven't written anything because I started a new blog. But I don't like it. Nothing will ever compare to Anonyme.com. It was a blogging site that mysteriously shut down one day. I just spent 2 hours scouring the way back machine trying to find any of my old posts. All I found was the fragment of a sentence: "When I think back to grade 6, it seems like a different person. I had weird hair, wore colourful clothes, and was quite outgoing. I know, it can't be me right?!?! In just 2 years..." Tha...

I've always been an extreme morning person, and have jumped out of bed at 7am regularly for most my life. Recently I became inspired to set my alarm further back to 5am, and it has really changed my life. I get so much work done, I plan my day, I can shower and make myself a nutritional breakfast instead of cheerios. Tomorrow I'm going to head off to Tim Hortons at 5:30 and do some serious week planning and homework before school. I feel like I've added extra days to my life. I've at least added...

I parked in front of Adrian's house to pick him up for our low maintenance valentines date to Tim Hortons, and this boy came out of his house in a suit and tie carrying an armful of roses and chocolate. I had told him the valentines budget was $3 but the bastard didn't listen. I really don't deserve him sometimes... because I think buying flowers is stupid and I threw them in a trash can on the way home from the date because I was too stubborn to let my dad see them (but I won't tell Adrian this...

The university I'm going to has single dorm rooms with a semi private bathroom. So basically you're room is completely separate (no roommates!)and you have an attached bathroom that 1 other person (who also has a single room on the other side) has access to. But the bathroom doors lock and are exactly like the front door, so you don't have to worry about you're bathroom mate having access to your room. These "premium singles" are a lot more expensive than the more traditional room mate and comm...

I don't believe in religion. I don't believe in anything supernatural. To be completely insensitive, how can people believe in hocus pocus that has never been seen or proven? How can they believe so hard that they build their whole lives around it? We have all the answers. Well, maybe not concrete answers about things like where did we come from, but we have way more evidence for evolution and the big bang theory than we do of god. We have exactly 0 pieces of evidence of god. We actually have ...

At least I believe that to be true. My school is known in my city for being very gay. We have our own pride parade, gender neutral washrooms and rainbow signs everywhere. I'm not really into that scene anymore. I used to be super involved in grade 9 when I went through a veeery cringe "bisexual phase." Ugh... I totally believe that homosexuality is valid, I think it's a spectrum and the only true sexualities are straight, bisexual and homosexual. Ah, and aromatnic/asexual, since I am aromanti...

Why are all my friends poor? Well, the elementary school I went to is located between two neighbourhoods: one is filled with run down, cheap and ugly townhomes/apartments and the other is filled with middle class single family homes. I live in the middle class neighbourhood, my friends live in the poor neighbourhood. When I attended elementary it just so happened that my neighbourhood was full of retirees, my family was literally the only ones with a kid in the whole area. All the kids who atten...

I slept at my boyfriend's Friday night and at my best friend's Saturday night. I hadn't seen my best friend, Laurie, since Christmas. Mostly because she had been kicked out of her house and had a lot of other drama too. She also likes to work as many 12 hour shifts as possible. It's hard to get a hold of her sometimes. Laurie and I have changed a lot. We sat across from each other at McDonald's and we didn't have much to say. She was texting people the entire time. Things aren't how they used t...

I don't want to leave Adrian, I like being with him. But I don't want to leave my house or city either, and I'm still doing that in the name of starting adulthood. I know I need to call it quits, it would be terribly unfair to drag this on when it's not going to go anywhere. He wants to meet a girl and get married and all... so it would be mighty selfish to hold him back from doing that. Which is basically what I'm doing. I will admit I am scared to say it's over for fear that I will not meet...

One of the main reasons I left my old blog was because I became aware of how pretentious I sounded in some posts and it made me cringe. When I was little I believed myself to be the smartest, fastest, prettiest and overall best kid in the whole school. These ideas were planted in my mind because I was spoiled and people would tell me I was these things. I always got the best grades, I always won games of tag and I was a very popular girl in elementary school. My life was perfect, the kind you s...

Sometimes, I daydream about what life might be if I stayed with Adrian. He wants a house and kids, the whole American dream, and he makes it loud and clear that he thinks I'm the perfect wife for this dream. I disagree, but I don't go into the nitty gritty with him. I humour him perhaps more than I should. I don't think he sees the bigger picture. He's so set on this perfect shiny life he has planned for us, but he doesn't see the hardships of it. For one, I want to make my career my life and...

I have one semester left. Looking back on my high school experience, I wouldn't have done anything different. I have loved loved loved everything about these four years, each one was better than the last. It started in September 2015 - grade 9. I was nervous and exited. I chose to go to a completely different high school than all my friends because it had a self-paced, independent study program. Not sure why I chose to jump head first into a strange school where I didn't know anyone when there ...

I realized yesterday that I am doing amazing in terms of keeping up with my work. You see, I fucked up my high school education completely and as a result had to fit both grade 11 and 12 into my grade 12 year. This means that I am taking grade 11 advanced functions, biology and chemistry and grade 12 creative writing all in this one semester at the same time. On top of this I am dealing with applying to universities, which is almost a course in itself. It dawned on me that my course load is i...

I have so much I have to do by January 23rd (1 and half weeks!). I have 2 chemistry tests, 2 math tests, a huge biology project worth 10% of my whole grade, and 2 creative writing projects, one of them being worth 20% of my final grade. On top of all that, I have to study for the biology, chemistry and math exams which begin the 24th and end the 29th. Oh, and I have to walk dogs for 45min - hour a day and fit in my full G license test. I also made some social commitments, like helping my fri...

I always write about my boyfriend because if you strip away that label he is truly just my best friend. But I do have 2 other friends, who are girls. Even though our trio used to be close as could be we really drifted apart in the last two years. We still see each other often and enjoy doing things together but it's not like it used to be. They have boyfriends too, but their relationships seem more real than Adrian and I's, maybe because they just met their boyfriends in the last 2 years and ...

Since I like my anonymity, Eulalie is not my real name. My real name is a very common one, it's been on the "top ten baby names in America" list since the year 2000, I swear. And it's not that I don't like the name, but it's never felt right at all. Is that weird? I have been referred to by it and conditioned to it for my entire existence, yet whenever my name is called it feels uncomfortable and awkward. When I write it on paper it just doesn't feel like me. And it's not just me but other peop...

I am good at arts and humanities, but talent does not aways equal passion. I don't like how greyscale these things are. I used to think I wanted to do art for my career, but that was quickly abandoned once I reached high school. I feel bad because I used to be such an advocate for the arts, but I must say I don't think art is very important anymore. I don't get it either. Some artwork is amazing, like he work of tattoo artist Mr K and the hyperrealism of religious paintings, but most artwork I...

One of the main reasons I left my old blog was because I became aware of how pretentious I sounded in some posts and it made me cringe. When I was little I believed myself to be the smartest, fastest, prettiest and overall best kid in the whole school. These ideas were planted in my mind because I was spoiled and people would tell me I was these things. I always got the best grades, I always won games of tag and I was a very popular girl in elementary school. My life was perfect, the kind you s...

I'm taking a brief break from studying to write. I've been studying really effectively recently, I'd say I only "waste" 3-5 hours a day (1 day = 12hrs). I am so incredibly thankful I get access to amazing technology throughout my education. I've heard of schools that prohibit or restrict technology, and to that I ask pressingly: How the fuck? I am 100% paperless. I have 5 sheets of emergency paper and I never use them. I write all my notes, tests and assignments using some sort of device. All m...

It's 2019, which means I'm turning 18 in 3 mere months. I can't stop it, I can't shove the months back, they are like clouds and I am an airplane. Undeterred. I don't want to! I feel like throwing a temper tantrum like a child. I remember last year I wrote the same thing in my blog about the year 17. I wish I could be 11 again. I wish Call Me Maybe had just been released and Minecraft was cool. I want my family's silver kia spectra back. I want to watch Smosh on YouTube and PewDiePie playing h...

I'm really excited to go to university, learn and earn a bachelor of science, but I'm terrified of actually having to walk on that campus, kiss my car goodbye and be a freshman again. I wish I could turn on autopilot and take a year long nap inside my head until 2nd semester when I'll feel like I know what I'm doing. I just know I'm going to have a million panic attacks at first. ...

All plans fell through for tonight. My boyfriend wasn't allowed to do anything fun and my friends were just feeble. So I'm spending my new years eve doing biology. I have a test on plants January 7th. My new years resolution is simple: Get good grades. So far I have a 90% average. My goal is a 92%. I want to do great things. I can taste them. I can't wait to get back to school. I've been missing labs, especially chemistry ones. I got to dissect a rat this semester! I got it all to myself be...

Why not start off bold this time? I'm hoping to fuck my boyfriend, Adrian, tonight. But it might not happen because his family will be home so wether or not I can stay over is still up in the air. I stayed over 2 nights ago and did not make a good impression. We arrived very drunk and had very drunk sex in his basement (which is his room) and I'd be surprised if they didn't hear us. I'll give you some parameters on Adrian and I's relationship: We met in 7th grade when we were both 12 We have...

Hello, my name is Eulalie. I am 17 years old and I live in Canada. I've had two blogs before and abandoned both when they got unenjoyable. I figured the new year is a good time to start again. Now I'm not sure where to start... I have 3 friends, one of them is my boyfriend and also a very long story. I am in 12th grade and have been accepted into three universities so far for medical and forensic sciences. I love science and math. I want to go to medical school and become a forensic pathologist...